contentthe primary content of this blog changes depending on what i'm hyperfixating on at the time.
spoilersthis blog is not reliably spoiler-free.
triggersi tag trigger warnings with [trigger tw]. the triggers i currently tag for are arachnophobia, pregnancy/childbirth, rape and animal abuse/death.
interactioni am 100% in favour of y'all coming into my inbox to scream about shared interests. please send me photos of your dog
age ratingthis blog contains nsfw and 18+ content. if you are a minor, i won't stop you following or interacting with me, but please be aware that you will see content on this blog that is not intended for you, and it's up to you to curate your own online experience. consider this your smut warning
Alrighty, since we don’t have one of these that I’ve seen before, here is a link to a Google Drive with some essential resources for fic writers in this fandom. This started out as just the SP timeline spite project to show up Landy but it sort of. Spiralled wildly out of control because I deal with tanking mental health by hyperfocusing on projects I can control down to extreme details ayyyyy
This fandom is generally a toxic hell-pit in my experience and this project is intended to make everyone’s time here a little better. So yes, I am okay with everyone using these resources, including the people I have blocked, and the people who have blocked me, on two conditions. Be civil and credit me/link back to the Fanpack GDrive so others can use it too. If you see this on someone else’s blog and are wondering if I’d mind you, specifically, using it - as long as you follow those two rules, you go right ahead. Enjoy.
Contains:
The SP Timeline - now available either in a single doc or in separate era-specific docs for ease of searching. If you have an OC who was included in the books, and you’d like me to include their birthdate/birth year, let me know.
Character Gallery - useful both for quickly looking up canon descriptions and for realising that Landy apparently has like three (3) physical descriptions total at his disposal. I added this while working on the SP Faces project, because I could not remember anything about any of the minor characters, and wanted a quick reference on hand.
Sanctuaries Overview - in case anyone wants to write a fic set outside Ireland. Now you can quickly reference who’s running your chosen country, and who’s working for that Sanctuary.
SP Faces - A folder of character headshots. These are all just my versions at the minute, but if you’d like to have yours added, let me know! Good for if you’re like me, and suck at picturing characters in your head.
If you think of a resource you’d like to have available, or you’ve already made one you’d like to have included, shoot me a message. I don’t get paid for this, so I won’t guarantee anything, but the next time I have a breakdown I might end up churning out whatever it is you want to see. ✌🏼
characters who are absolutely convinced down to their bones that they are unlovable being subjected to the mortifying ideal of being wholly and unconditionally loved. that’s the good stuff. never get tired of it.
“I can fix him” good for you. I need to craft a scenario in which he betters himself, to prove to myself that I can meaningfully atone despite how much of myself I see in him.
“I can make him worse” I can too but first I have to prove that there was hope for him somewhere, at some point, which he rejected. Because if there was never any hope for him, what hope is there for me?
I don’t need to fix him because he doesn’t need to be fixed in order to be worthy of loving.
Remember if you’re out at a store and someone says “This is a robbery” you can say “no it’s not” and then the robber will leave because theyre a robber and this is no longer a robbery .
You can not just say this without dropping the whole story
Ok so,
My dads coworker is at the front and this man comes Up and hands him a document.
The coworker took a Look at the document and while he couldn’t read the things written by Hand, because he wasn’t wearing his glases, he did notice the Logo of a different Bank so he’s like:
“Oh, sorry sir you can’t do that here! You have to go to the other Bank for this :)”
The man, visibly confused leaves, but dosen’t take the document with him.
The coworker, now just as confused as the Guy actually Takes Out his glases and reads the hand written part:
This is a robbery
Can you imagine trying to rob a god damn bank and the teller just cheerfully tells you to go rob the competition instead
I worked as a bank teller for several years and a few things you should know, bank robberies happen far more frequently than you might think and they come in waves. When a bank gets robbed a notification with photos goes to all banks in the area to be on the lookout. And there are two kinds of robbery, the pass the note and the takeover (what you see in movies).
So our branch had had a big takeover robbery as well as a note one. We also had a teller that had transferred to our branch after having been through a robbery. She was sweet as apple pie, hair up to the ceiling, southern lady who had just been through multiple robberies.
A guy comes in and hands her a folded note. Her immediate thought was “this guy needs to learn you don’t hand bank tellers notes. I am just not going to read that.” So how the conversation goes:
Her: how can I help you today?
Him: I’m here to get money
Her: great *hands him a withdrawal slip*
Him: all the information is on the paper
Her: to process the transaction I need you to put it on my piece of paper
SO HE FILLS OUT A WITHDRAWAL SLIP. Meanwhile another coworker is looking at her latest robbery notification email thinking the guy at the window looks a lot like him but the teller is calm and seems to be following standard transaction.
Back at the window the teller notices his name on the withdrawal slip doesn’t match the name on the account so she asks for his ID. He once again tells her all the relevant info is on the folded note but also gives her his ID and says it is his dad’s account. She tells him he will need a check from his dad to get cash. He grabs the note and leaves.
ONE HOUR LATER
Two new robbery notifications hit our emails, both branches within a mile. It is our guy. Teller goes over to the manager and sheepishly informs them he was here and the time. Security department is notified as are local police and the FBI. The FBI comes over believing that these poor tellers had been robbed for the 3rd time in a month and take her statement. She is completely embarrassed telling them how everything went down and he kept signaling to the note and telling her to read it but she was just done.
To which this FBI agent of 40 years who has been to the scene of many bank robberies (several at this branch in recent weeks) says: Ok. Let me see if I got this right, he came in fully intending to rob you. He gave you the note and you just…refused to read it? So he left and went to the bank literally across the street, handed them the exact same note, and they just handed him five grand? Do I have that correct?”
Her: I am so embarrassed
FBI: this is best thing I have ever heard. He even handed you his ID! Holy-
Her: I feel so dumb!
FBI: don’t! This is the best thing I have ever heard. This is going to be in training courses. (He sat there giddy for at least 5 more minutes)
I have a similar story from my friend Fred, who is a great human and I like him lots.
He was working at a 7-11 that got robbed a lot, working nights. And he was bored and read though his entire contract and learned if you’re shot at work you get $200,000. Also, he hated his boss and the job.
So when a guy came in to rob him at gunpoint he got excited and was able to hatch the plan he had been pondering while dealing with a Shitty Boring Job.
“Dude. Shoot me in the leg. Right here- it’ll go through and not hit anything vital and I’ll be able to quit this fucking job. I’ll give you fifty fucking grand to shoot me in the leg then you can take everything in the register.”
This ended with him chasing the weeping attempted burglar out of his store screaming “SHOOT ME YOU FUCKING COWARD I WANT THE MONEY”.
One of my uncles was a branch manager at a local bank when I was a kid. His branch had the dubious honor of being one of- if not the- most robbed bank in the area. There was a bullet hole in the wall behind his desk where he’d been shot at once.
One day, this guy came in and announced he was there to rob the place. This man was smoking a cigar with one hand and had a gun in the other.
My uncle pointed at the “No Smoking” sign and told him in no uncertain terms, “Put that cigar out, or finish it outside first.”
This guy, bless his heart, went back outside to finish his cigar.
My uncle locked the door behind him and waited for the cops to show up.
it’s funny when my friends who aren’t on tumblr send me tumblr posts from other sites cause their either an extremely popular post that i’ve seen 20 times on my dash in the last day or like. the children’s hospital post. don’t get me wrong i still appreciate their gifts but it’s like. thank you for foraging these berries for me unfortunately i live in the bush
i think if we’re going to have conversations about consent we should talk about how consenting to something doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to be a good experience, and having a bad experience doesn’t necessarily mean someone violated your consent. this can apply to a lot of situations but the two i’m thinking of right now are sex and transition.
you’re getting it on with someone. you enthusiastically consent to having sex with them. afterward, you feel a little weird about it. maybe even distressed. maybe they did something you didn’t enjoy and in the moment you just didn’t say anything. maybe you just realized after the fact that you were not in a good headspace for sex and now your mental health is declining. that doesn’t inherently mean the person you had sex with violated your consent. sometimes it just means you need to take a break from sex or work on communicating your needs or boundaries better during sex.
and with transition, i feel like this is something that gets consistently overlooked but like. there will never be zero detransitioners. there will always be people who decide that actually transition wasn’t right for them. they could have had the best most thorough doctors in the world who did everything by the book and got full informed consent at every step. and some people are still going to decide they don’t like the changes and wish they hadn’t transitioned. that doesn’t mean that the doctors violated their consent, and that doesn’t mean that transition shouldn’t be available to anyone. it just means that we need to have more resources available for folks who detransition.
regret does not automatically mean someone did something wrong. regret is simply one possible result of having bodily autonomy, and i think we need to get more comfortable with that.
Y’all know when Mulan is sitting in the rain and watches her parents silhouette disappear as the candle is blown out and then her eyes squint in determination and the music that starts to play and you see her go into the family temple and light a match and bow in respect and then sneak into her parents room and switch the scroll for her hair brooch and then the way her reflection is shown as she pulls the sword and cuts her hair?? It’s literally more iconic than any marvel movie
Y’all know that there is heavy symbolism in that scene to show that Mulan is the spirit of the Great Stone Dragon and that’s why Mushu wasn’t able to awaken it?
im sorry What!! i never knew this! my life feels fuller!!! ahhhh
Mulan sits in the rain underneath the statue of the Great Stone Dragon (who is looking down on her), and suddenly decides on a course of action. She looks up, resolved to go to war in place of her father and runs into the temple where she lights the match and beseeches protection for her family. The stone she bows to and that we see lit up by lightening strike is that of the dragon, whose eyes are looking out after her, lit from underneath by the candles. The scene transitions to the divider in the house that also has an icon of the dragon. where she replaces her hair comb with the summons. Then we see the sword hilt, also the dragon, and as she draws the blade we see her face replace it. She ties up her hair, then as she opens the wardrobe, the handles are also the dragon. After donning the armor, the view shows her facing us, with the hilt of the sword (the face of the dragon) in front of her face, where she then turns the sword to reveal her face, and sheaths it. As she leaves, we flash back to the temple, and the eyes of the dragon flash as her grandmother wakes up.
The Great Stone Dragon resides within her. She is the protector of the family.
After this explanation, the scene where Mushu cannot wake up the stone dragon makes so much more sense. I appreciate the symbolism so much more. I noticed the dragon but didn’t notice she was constantly juxtaposed with the dragon!
Canon accepted.
I can’t believe I never sussed this out! THANK YOU SO MUCH for this!!!!!
youd think horses were one of those animals that has horrible health due to humans breeding unhealthy animals to achieve a certain look but no they really are just naturally that fucked up
horses’ lungs bleed when they run at a certain speed
if their diet is too rich / low in selenium their hooves fall off
excuse me
The reason they have such poor health outcomes after breaking or otherwise injuring their legs is because their legs are actually hyper-specialized fingers; and as in human fingers, there is very little muscle supporting the bone, just a lot of cartilage and tendons and whatnot. You’d think an animal that literally evolved to run away to avoid being eaten would have ALSO evolved sturdier running appendages, but…
I fucking hate this post, it’s 1 AM I don’t want to know that horse legs are giant fucking fingers
Also if temperatures fluctuate too intensely and rapidly, it fucks up their digestive track and since they can’t throw up they basically just die instead
if you want me to consume a new media you MUST catch me at the exact moment when the stars are aligned and the air pressure is equal to the current degree of the sun’s peak against the horizon and all the cosmic energies are perfectly unified (aka my old interest is fading out) or i will nod and say “im adding that to my list!” Knowing theres no chance i will check it out
“unless its a book!” “unless you tell me it has gay people in it!” “this but only for live action shows” “theres a good chance i’ll get to it eventually” no wrong this post is not for you this post is ONLY for bitches who could have a treasured friend recommend them something that sounds grown in a lab to be your personal catnip and, with no choice in the matter, immediately know it will never be the right time to watch/read/listen to it
‘All that you need to know about boars can be summed up in the fact that if you wish to hunt them, you must have a specially made boar spear. This spear has a crosspiece on it to prevent the boar from charging the length of the spear, driving it all the way through his own body, to savage the human holding the other end.’
-Boar and Apples, T. Kingfisher
fuck OFF
Note that pigs are also HUGE. So, yes, they ARE slightly larger pigs.
So I grew up in the city and have never seen a pig in real life and I just googled it and WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS
I thought they were like labrador sized, like, fat labradors, not mini-cows.
every time I see this post there are more people discovering how fuck off huge pigs actually are and I love it I thought this was a thing everyone knew but clearly not and I’m laughing
This is me with our Tamworth boar, a heritage breed closer to their wild cousins than the Yorkshire above. I am a fully grown, average sized human. He was a gentle sweetie who, sadly, is no longer with us. His name was Mr. Big.
FUCK OFF
Forever laffin’ at people who don’t understand how enormous, terrifying, and tenacious wild boar are.
They’re like if bears had knives protruding from their closed mouths and Didn’t Know When To Quit. Their survival instincts when they’re wounded aren’t “run away and minimize injury” it’s “take the thing that hurt you down with you” They also make sounds like someone crossed a pig with an alligator.
Their head and neck alone can be like the size of an entire human torso.
Also forever laffin’ at people who think pigs are tiny, ‘cause we designed those things can get in the neighbourhood of a thousand pounds in ideal circumstances.
It’s like when people assume Tuna must be small because they’ve only ever experienced them in hockey puck form.
Like seriously why the fuck y'all think everyone FREAKED THE HELL OUT when Dorothy fell into the pig pen in Wizard of Oz? It’s because pigs are HUGE and weigh a shitton and would crush her in an instant.
also dont they eat like, basically anything?
YUP. Pigs will eat people, if given the chance. They dgaf.
That’s why boar hunters use a team of very tenacious dogs to hold the boar so they can be speared without fucking you up. The dogs wear body armour.
I’ve heard stories of people shooting boars, and if it didn’t kill them, it just pissed them off.
how the hell did we ever domesticate these things?
…“how the hell did we ever domesticate these things?”
Very carefully, I would imagine.
WIld boar babies are rather cute, like living humbugs…
…but the adults and their ferocity have been associated with warriors for thousands of years, from Mycenaean Greece (a helmet made from sections of boar tusk)…
…through Celtic Europe (reconstructed carnyx war-horns and standards)…
…Ancient Rome (the crest of Legion 20 “Valeria Victrix”). A couple more legions also used a boar as their crest - I wonder did they squabble over which was the “right” one the way a couple of Swiss cantons had a little war over whose bear was best…?
…then Anglo-Saxon and pre-Viking helmet crests…
…right up to the late Middle Ages (here the white boar badge of Richard Duke of Gloucester, later Richard III of England)…
…and the blue boar badge of the Earl of Oxford,
more usually represented by the De Vere arms, quarterly gules and or, in
the first a molet argent.
After Richard was defeated at Bosworth in 1485, there was a run on blue
paint as inn-signs were changed to reflect new loyalties since Oxford
was on the winning side…
It gets mentioned in the movie “Snatch”, the book/movie “Hannibal” and the webcomic “Lackadaisy Cats”, among numerous other fictional sources, and IRL it’s suspected to be the reason why numerous missing persons have stayed missing.
More here (another comment to this same OP) and here (slightly different).
Here’s some boar-hunting armour for dogs, ancient…
…and modern…
…and the modern one looks very like a simple style of ancient…
So when Odysseus’s old nurse recognizes him by the scar he got from the boar-tusk slash that almost killed him… now you get the resonance.